Retrace your steps, check the dryer, check the washer, check your foot, try as you will, but it is apparent that your sock is gone. And there is only one explanation.
SOMEONE IS STEALING YOUR SOCKS!!!
Our finest detectives were the first on the case.
Below you see an unclear picture of what appears to be a tall, handsome male with black n' sexy hair carrying a box, going about what appears to be his business. But what is his business? It appears to be SOCK STEALING!
Later, we discovered what appears to be the box that the suspect was carrying to be full of what appear to be socks.
Left next to the box was an incriminating letter, written on what appears to be normal white paper, but without any fingerprints or blood left, we could not identify what would appear to be who the letter was sent to.
To recap:
At this point in the case, our finest detectives made an important discovery:
No one cares about their damn socks enough.
After this discovery, they quickly found out the culprit, the same criminal determined responsible for putting gum underneath desks, plotting to kill Brett, leaving doors open, spitting on short people, plotting to kill Brett twice, jaywalking, and other such crimes that, again, no one cares about.
It was, of course, EVIL BANANA.
The elusive, malevolent, scapegoat fruit that has a rap sheet as big as my ego.
My beautiful, beautiful, ego.
Our detectives went on to play Super Smash Bros Brawl, and gamed happily ever after.
Conclusion/moral:
Sometimes you lose socks.
Deal with it.
I, on the other hand, have actually gained seven socks since coming to college!
Wearing your mismatched socks,
~Woody
P.S. In response to allegations that I am what has been called a "shrubfucker", I must first deny any physical relations between me and any grass-type Pokemon or any unhealthy or sexual relationship between me and any plants.
P.P.S. t('.'-t)
P.P.P.S. That's Kirby flipping you off, Brett.
P.P.P.P.S. Die.
No comments:
Post a Comment